The 10 Reasons Why Kevin Doesn't Live With Gwen
by KandiLips
Summary: After Kevin's garage is burned down, he's in desperate need of a place to stay, and the Tennyson home is JUST that place. Oh, God, this could end quite badly... SERIES OF ONE-SHOTS. Rated T for safety. Contains Kevin being stupid and GWEVIN!
1. Driving In Circles

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_

_**Okay, so you're all probably wondering HOW I came up with the crazy and dangerous idea of Kevin living with the Tennysons. Well, in the episode "Fused", Kevin's house catches on fire and starts to burn down, and, since I'm guessing he wasn't able to SAVE it, I just couldn't resist this wonderful opportunity. I mean, c'mon! Everyone knows that Gwen's parents hate Kevin, so this is bound to be interesting, and unfortunately, possibly very life-threatening for Kevin. Anyways, enough with my ranting, let's get this show on the road!**_

_**STANDARD DISCLAIMER:**_

_**There are two things that SHOULD happen in my lifetime. One, Kevin should run for president, and two, I should take over MOA. But since those things are most-likely never going to happen, I'm going to shut up now.**_

_**The 10 Reasons Why Kevin Doesn't Live With Gwen:**_

_**#1: Driving In Circles**_

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NOBODY'S POV:

"Mom, Dad!"

The red-head came sprinting through the front door, nearly knocking over every single thing her parents owned and cherished.

"What is it?" Frank stared down at his red-headed beauty in complete shock. "You're not pregnant, are you?"

"No!" Gwen's emerald eyes widened immensely with horror as she brought her hands up to rest on her hips. She watched with a slight smirk as her relieved mother sighed, the woman's hands crossed against her chest. "But that doesn't mean you're gonna like it, though." The girl bit her lip nervously, her mind running cautiously over her words and scanning them for errors.

"Gwendolyn what.." Lily choked, her fearful gaze locked on her daughter as she stepped forward.

"Yesterday," Gwen began, the pace of her heart picking up rapidly. "I was out fighting aliens with Ben and..."

"Kevin." Her parents muttered the name simultaneously in complete disgust, both still not over the fact that their daughter would date such a ruffian.

"Yes, _Kevin._" The scarlet-haired teen sucked in a badly-needed deep breath. "And the garage, his_ home,_ was burned down to the ground. Now he has no where to go, and I was wondering, could he..."

"No!" Lily spat, her voice on the edge of fuming anger as she she scrubbed the dishes a little too hard, accidentally causing one to crack in two.

"But mom, he's..."

"You heard your mother, young lady! No." Frank crossed his arms, ready to full-out yell at Gwen if he had to. There was no way that filthy mongrel his daughter called "her boyfriend" would even take one step inside his home.

Her brows furrowed with utmost determination, Gwen was _not_ giving up.

"But now he's going to be forced to live on the streets again!" Gwen flashed her parents an exceedingly saddened, puppy dog face.

"And why should we care what happens to him?" Her mother's emerald gaze narrowed into a glare.

"Because now he's homeless. And because I love him, and because he's a good guy who likes to help people. And well, frankly I don't think you give him enough credit for his actions!" Gwen growled, sitting down in a vacant, nearby arm chair and crossing her arms frustratedly.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but, are we both still talking about the guy that makes regular dangerous weapon deals in the streets?" Her father sighed exasperatedly. "The guy that used to hunt you down and try to kill you and your cousin? And now you're asking me to let him stay in _my_ house? Yeah, no way!"

"But Kevin has changed." Gwen insisted, her voice flowing with love and adoration as it lingered on his name. "Now he helps Ben and I defeat the villains, he's on the good side! _And_ he's saved my life countless numbers of times, not to mention Ben's. He protects me, he loves me, AND he takes me shopping, which I know he can't stand." Gwen stared sincerely up at her parents. "What more could you possibly want for your daughter's boyfriend?"

After Frank and Lily exchanged a long glance, they both nodded, and they finally turned back to their daughter, their expressions softened but still upset.

"I know we'll soon regret this but," Lily sighed. "Kevin can stay here until he gets his house rebuilt."

"Yes!" Gwen cheered, her eyes filled with joy.

"BUT," Frank interjected sternly. "He must obey _all_ of the rules, and if I find that he's done anything to upset the balance around here, he's _out."_ His gaze now turned directly on his daughter. "And if you even _think_ about trying ANYTHING with him, I swear, Gwendolyn, you'll..."

"Dad!" Gwen whined, her cheeks blushing furiously. "Stop it! You know I won't."

"Let's keep it that way." Her mother smiled lightly. "Now, where _is_ Kevin?"

"Um, I think he's outside?" Gwen darted to the front door and yanked it open, her parents close behind.

Gwen was correct; Kevin _was_ outside. He just wasn't doing what she had expected.

Because what the startled red-head and her family saw outside was Kevin's car zipping around the street's cul-de-sac in a never-ending circle like he was a professional NASCAR race car driver.

"MYYYY HEADDDDD FEELSSSS ALLLLLL SPINNYYYYY!" Kevin chuckled so loudly that almost every house on the block flashed their lights on. And the stunned Tennyson family stared in horror as Kevin lost control of the vehicle, his sports car colliding noisily with Lily's diligently-attended to garden...

"I forgot to mention," Gwen mumbled, extremely embarrassed and craving the idea of hiding her face in her hands. "Kevin _likes_ driving in circles."

All the girl's parents needed to respond to that unnecessary comment with was some excessive eye-rolling action and a hand-full of glares.

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_**AUTHOR'S NOTE ENDING:**_

_**Oh, Kevin. You never fail to make me chuckle. Alrighty, that's all for now! Review if you enjoyed it, and know that I'll be back to write more! Bye!**_


	2. Basket Riding

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**__**  
Okay, I have totally been neglecting this Fanfic, so here's a whole **__**new reason**__** why Kevin shouldn't live with Gwen, and it's a pretty darn good reason, if you ask me. And just a warning before you read this; things WILL get freaking insane.  
**__**  
STANDARD DISCLAIMER:**__**  
I do not, have not, and will not ever own Ben 10, 'cause MOA beat me to the punch.  
**__  
_

_**The 10 **__**Reasons Why**__** Kevin Shouldn't Live With Gwen  
Reason #2: Basket Riding**_

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Nobody's POV:

Kevin Levin snickered to himself as he dragged the laundry basket to the edge of the top of the three flights of stairs, tightening the strap of his old biking helmet as he pulled it on. Mrs. Tennyson had taken Gwen out to go shopping, and Mr. Tennyson was away at his work, so now was the ideal moment to try out something he had always wanted to do: ride down a stair case in a laundry basket.  
Was he crazy? Yes.  
Did he care? No.  
Chuckling to himself, the dark-haired teen slowly lowered himself into the basket, a look of complete joy upon his face. And he silently began the countdown to push-off.  
_One...  
Two...  
Three!_  
Shrieking with jubilancy, Kevin pushed off; his little, unstable basket zooming down the staircase so fast, he almost peed his pants. His face as pale as snow, the ex-ruffian clutched the edges of the basket with tense, white-knuckled fists. And Kevin began to scream, his heart hammering uncontrollably.  
As he neared the last flight of stairs, the adrenaline-powered teenager could distinctly hear the opening and closing of a door, and the sounds of voices and footsteps filled the house.  
And Kevin knew he was screwed from the moment an unaware Mrs. Tennyson stepped out into the specific area his laundry basket was headed towards, her back turned to him as she watered her plants.  
The problem: he was going way too fast to slow down.  
His black gaze wide with fear, Kevin opened his mouth to scream out a warning to the woman. But Gwen, who was now standing, her mouth wide open, as she stared in complete horror at the approaching death machine, got to that first.  
"MOM! RUN FOR IT!" She screamed, running over to grab her perplexed mother's arm, and tried desperately to pull her away.  
"What? Honey, what's..." Lily Tennyson began, her question abruptly cutting off as she was suddenly slammed into and knocked down by a certain ex-con and his laundry basket-riding operation. The woman screamed as Kevin and his basket proceeded to flip over; the battered plastic household item smashing into Mrs. Tennyson's plants and causing their vases to go cascading across the room and shatter noisily against the floor.  
And all went quiet.  
Trembling, Lily Tennyson weakly pulled herself from the wreckage, her body painfully working its way over to the destroyed remains of her flowers. She shook her head, bending over to examine her beheaded beauties. "Why is it _always_ my flowers?" She moaned.  
Kevin coughed as he pushed the demolished laundry basket off of him, and an exasperated Gwen walked over to help him to his feet.

"I guess I should've crash tested that first, huh?" Kevin admitted with a weak smile, feeling not-so-very-comfortable as his words were greeted with cold glares from two very unhappy Tennysons.

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_**AUTHOR'S NOTE ENDING:**_

_**Well, THAT didn't turn out so good for Kevin. Told you guys this chapter would be crazy! Haha, okay, I'm done here. Review below, por favor! See ya! **_


	3. Cooking Fail

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_

_**And we're back for another exciting session of why Kevin should never live with the Tennyson family. Believe me, if you haven't yet been convinced, you WILL be now. Here we go!**_

_**STANDARD DISCLAIMER:**_

_**WARNING: I, as an author, am not responsible for any over-the-top insanity endured while reading this chapter. Okay, maybe just a little.**_

_**The 10 Reasons Why Kevin Shouldn't Live With Gwen**_

_**Reason 3: Cooking Fail**_

_**

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**_Author's POV:

Kevin yawned as he ambled wearily into the Tennyson family's kitchen, rubbing his eyes. It was seven o'clock in the morning, as in nobody in the house was awake yet. Except for Gwen. But then again, Gwen was an exception to many things.

Flicking on the lights, the dark-haired teen sleepily made his way over to the pale, ivory cabinets and pulled out a pan, dropping it carelessly on the stove top with a noisy clatter.

Kevin had began noticing from some of the rather _wild _events of the past few days that Mr. and Mrs. Tennyson really didn't like him so much, although Kevin couldn't even begin to comprehend why. After all, he was purely amazing; everybody knew that. But, as much as this was true, the ex-con knew that he very-much-so needed to get them on his good side.

And desperate times call for desperate measures: he was going to cook breakfast for the family.

After picking up the idea from one of the latest issues of "_How To Make Your Girlfriend's Parents Like You" Magazine_, Kevin knew that making breakfast for everyone was the way to go. And, according to the magazine, the idea was nearly a hundred percent fail-safe!

Thing was, they'd never met anyone like Kevin before.

The obsidian-eyed boy snorted. _cooking. _How hard could it really be? No, he'd never actually tried it- his mom had always cooked for him, but if over-paid celebrities on Food Network TV shows could do it, then dang it, he could too!

If only Kevin knew what he was getting himself into.

With a deep breath, Kevin turned on the heat, and began to lower the hash browns into the pan. He figured that making hash browns was safe… enough. His hand trembling, the teen worried that the hash browns' reaction to the hot pan would be explosive, and he slowly took a few steps back; bracing himself for them to touch it…

With a yelp, Kevin threw the hash browns onto the pan and sprinted out of the kitchen, just to be safe.

Nothing. Nothing at all had happened- he was safe. Sighing with relief, Kevin strode back over to the pan, watching with wide eyes as the raw potato patties cooked before him. He was doing it! He was actually doing it, and he wasn't messing anything up for a change. With a massive grin, the midnight-haired teen pulled up a chair and sat himself down in it; unaware that he was slowly drifting off to sleep…

A startled Kevin awoke twenty minutes later to the unmistakable smell of smoke.

_Crap._

Orange and yellow flames were now dancing around the stove; circling the pan that had once held the wonderful, cooking hash browns that were now mere fragments of inflamed potato.

"NO! No, no, no, NO!" Kevin yelled, frantically running around the kitchen in a big, never-ending circle like a chicken with its head cut off, On the verge of a heart attack, the boy grabbed two oven mitts out of the cabinet, hastily pulled them on and began whacking down on the fire with them, hoping to put it out. Screaming in horror and discarding them into the flames as they caught on fire right before his eyes, Kevin reached for the bottles of Mr. Tennyson's fancy French liquor, with the worst idea yet on his mind.

And what was already horrible became a nightmare.

His face distorted with panic, the ex-ruffian popped open the bottles and began pouring the alcohol into the flames, which, as any normal person knows, only makes the situation ten times worse.

Kevin shrieked as the fire grew a thousand times bigger due to this action; moving on from just the stove to engulfing half of the Tennyson's kitchen.

With else nothing left to do, Kevin began swearing at the hash browns and thanking God for preventing the Tennysons from waking up, because at this point in time, it seemed nearly impossible.

But there was one Tennyson who was awake.

Striding exasperatedly into the kitchen with a fire extinguisher in hand, Gwen calmly approached the fire, sprayed it thoroughly with the fire extinguisher's white foam until the fire was completely put out, turned, wordlessly patted Kevin on the head, and exited the room.

Completely speechless as he stood there, rooted to the floor of the now-ruined kitchen, Kevin stared after his girlfriend, wondering why the heck the thought of using a fire extinguisher hadn't come to his mind.

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_**AUTHOR'S NOTE ENDING:**_

_**LOL, Kevin's so stupid. 'Kay, hope you all enjoyed that little "burning kitchen" episode- now you just have to wait 'till next chapter to find out what Mr. and Mrs. Tennysons' reactions are to it! Anyways… review, pretty please! That'd be amazing! 'Kay, laterz!**_


	4. Couch Fiasco

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_

_**Hello, there! So, did you know that a whale's penis is called a 'dork'? And no, I am not lying. One of my very close friends just informed me of this today. I laughed so hard that milk came out of my nostrils. (And yes if you're wondering, I was drinking milk; the milk didn't just suddenly pour from my nose out of nowhere) ANYWAYS, on with another chapter of why Kevin shouldn't live with Gwen. This one is one of my favorites, btw. Enjoy!**_

_**STANDARD DISCLAIMER:**_

_**Don't own. Sadly never will.**_

_**The 10 Reasons Why Kevin Shouldn't Live With Gwen**_

_**Reason 4: Couch Fiasco**_

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Author's POV:

The devious, dark-haired teen chuckled maniacally, his normally-deep voice shrill like a person who had recently inhaled a lot of helium as he jumped up and down on the Tennyson's living room couch. For all the time that he had lived with his mother, he had _never _been allowed to partake in such a "dangerous action" as couch-jumping, as his mom had specifically worded when she banned said activity. This probably had something to do with the fact that Kevin had been around five years old at the time, and also due to the fact that the boy had a notorious rep for breaking things.

Doors, televisions, _brick walls_; they all just seemed to "fall apart" when Kevin was around.

Mrs. Levin hadn't just been worried about the well-being of her reckless son when she told him no couch-jumping; she had been worried about the well-being of the couch itself.

So that was why Kevin was feeling rather badass as he bounced up and down on the cushioned, beige couch. Because jumping on it made him feel like he was breaking some huge, serious law that would end up costing him big time.

But now that Kevin was much older, he knew that jumping on a couch wouldn't kill him. How could it? It was just a couch; it wasn't like it had fangs.

Kevin snickered at the ridiculous thought.

Feeling very free and somewhat high on adrenaline, Kevin cackled away, jumping to his little heart's desire. After twelve years, he was finally living his dream. And it was the best damn thing he'd ever tried doing.

The experience was so fun, so amazing, so utterly great.

He _never _wanted to stop.

the raven-haired boy began to try to increase the altitude of his jumps; challenging himself to get higher with every bounce. He simply couldn't believe that his own mom would ban him from taking part in something as exhilarating as this.

Because it was so fantastic.

"…Kevin…?"

The ex-ruffian's onyx gaze shifted up to see Mrs. Tennyson emerging from around the corner, cautiously approaching the still-cackling boy with an extremely bewildered expression. She yawned and rubbed her eyes groggily. "It's three in the morning. What are you…?" Her voice trailed off.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Tennyson. I just… I just couldn't resist, m'am." He spoke with a wide grin and a goofy chuckle. "This is my first time couch-jumping, you see. I just had to try it."

"Ah, well then. Okay. That's… that's not really very normal, but go ahead, have fun…" The woman scratched the back of her head, her green eyes glowing with pure astonishment.

_Never _in all of her life had she met anybody quite as strange and peculiar as Kevin. In fact, he was the weirdest person she knew. She desperately hoped that her daughter would not marry him.

As Lily continued to watch the overly-giddy bad boy hopping around on her favorite, brand new living room couch, her flabbergasted expression took on a more concerned one. "Kevin, maybe you should stop jumping now. You could get hurt…"

_Or my couch could get hurt. _Mrs. Tennyson thought to herself grumpily.

"Oh, _no, _Mrs. Tennyson." Kevin chortled in between bounds. "You worry too much. This is perfectly safe. There's absolutely _nothing _dangerous about…"

And as the dark-eyed delinquent made one final jump, Mrs. Tennyson's favorite couch went crashing down right through the floor with Kevin clinging to it for dear life; his horrid, drawn-out screaming fading as the couch descended and ending as the couch smashed against the basement floor in an intensely resonant collision.

Silence.

"Kevin…?" Lily gasped, racing over to peer down the massive, gaping hole that was now in the middle of her living room.

And there she saw Kevin, his body all sprawled out in the middle of an enormous wreckage of springs, wood, upholstery, and cushion-filling that _was _her beautiful couch.

"I'll… buy you a new couch…?" Kevin asked embarrassedly, a purple stain creeping up his neck to stain his cheeks as he rubbed an aching spot on his head.

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_**AUTHOR'S NOTE ENDING:**_

_**Oh, Kevin, you should have listened to your mother. AND to Gwen's mother. OK! You know the drill- please rate and review, and I'll love you forever and ever. Tell me- did it suck, or did it rock? Thanks for readin'! Later! **_


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